Mac and Cheese

We have our next appointment tomorrow and I am absolutely terrified. This is the appointment where we should be able to see a heartbeat, if we don't see it something is definitely wrong and I am just so scared that we won't see one.

I haven't had any spotting but I know that you can still miscarry without spotting. I still feel sick after eating and before, but there could still be pregnancy hormones floating around even if I wasn't technically pregnant anymore. I still get exhausted easily and sometimes lightheaded but this could also occur even if something had gone wrong.

So with all these fun thoughts floating around in my head, I did the only thing I could. I made homemade macaroni and cheese with real butter and way too many calories.

It tasted good and even though I was only able to finish half a bowl before feeling sick it did make me feel a bit better. The hubby is sure that we are going to have a great appointment tomorrow. I sure hope so. I try to remind myself that the odds are in my favor even if it sometimes doesn't feel like it and that helps. Pregnancy can be so scary but I know hearing the heartbeat will make me forget all of this. So if anyone has good vibes, prayers, etc to spare it would be great if you could send some my way, if you are ever in the area I will even make you some ridiculously unhealthy mac and cheese :)