Tired, frustrated, exhausted, depressed, at times miserable, overwhelmed, anxious.
These are a few words which describe how I felt for the first months of Teddy's life. "I'm looking forward to a break between being pregnant, nursing, and having a second. I'm excited to just focus on Teddy for awhile, and hope to space my children about 3 years apart." Was my general sentiment when it came to spacing.
Keyword: was
That's right, I the person who thought she was immune from baby fever for at least another year, am excited to try for another.
Even knowing that I could spend 4 months with the hangover from hell
(babyhangover= 1st trimester= all day and all night terrible nausea, upset stomach, and the occasional case of vomiting) and then 3 months with a ginormous stomach which causes terrible back pain and makes strangers ask if I'm having twins and when they are due, "Not for 7 weeks... thanks for the reminder." And then if I really get lucky 4 months of a colicky baby who screams, and screams, and screams, and then cries to mix it up a bit. And still I look at pregnant friends and think, "Ooh I want that!"
DH has banned all baby talk for the next 6 months.Which is A-OK. I didn't want to start trying until the end of summer anyway. This was clearly implied when I agreed to the baby talk ban.
Teddy is doing his part to ensure the speedy arrival of a new sibling by consistently sleeping through the night, and being the most awesome little boy around during the day- "Keep it up buddy!"
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Mom rivals
Theodor and I were at an open baby meet up today and one of my favorite mommy pet peeves happened...
"MOM RIVALS"
Basically this involves moms sizing each other up, treating their child like some sort of product and comparing them to show how their skillzz are in fact the best. It goes without saying that I find it ridiculous and try not to play but I will admit it is sometimes hard not to get sucked in.
I imagine some of the moms come from corporate jobs and have a strong urge to feel like they are succeeding and doing this parenting thing "the right way", whereas others were probably incredibly obnoxious before they had children and nothing much has changed. Either way it gets so tiring constantly hearing the same crap.
Oh so how is your child sleeping? Oh really? My child is sleeping through the night. Or if your child is also sleeping through the night then their child sleeps till 9 in the morning AND takes 2 two hour naps- there is always a way to be better.
Ooh are you giving your child that? My doctor said/I heard you should actually do such and such, which is of course what we are doing.
Must be said in horrified tone- oh my gosh is it OK for your child to do that/play with something plastic/stick random crap off the floor in their mouth/insert other normal child behavior here? Hmm well we are holding off on that until XYZ because we heard that is best but that is neat that you are just putting caution to the wind and letting your child do it- insert condescending smile here-
Today one mom looked at Teddy and said, "Oh gosh what happened to you little man? Look at those bruises, did you fall down? Or how did you get hurt? That looks so painful. What happened? ... (this went on for like a minute and a half and I didn't say anything he is 9 1/2 months and can't talk if she was really wondering she could address me) All said in a fake sing song voice to him as he tried to crawl away. Now of course someone could ask what happened because they were genuinely interested (which has happened and doesn't bother me in the least) but that clearly wasn't the case today. This is what I was thinking in my head but didn't say.
First off, clearly he fell, I didn't punch him in the forehead with one finger if that is what you are implying. Second off, I can't help it that your almost one year old is a lump that just learned how to sit up, and doesn't move at all. Mine does, and since we let him explore he sometimes falls down and gets bumps but doesn't seem to be bothered in the least. This does not make me a bad mother or a good one since I cannot change the person who my son is. Speaking of which your child is cute and I would never really think they were a lump but you my friend are very annoying.
Thankfully there is normally at least one other mom who seems to be on a similar wavelength but for every 1 normal, relaxed mom I feel like there are 3 uptight, condescending, annoying ones who always show up at these things.
I know this post is sort of negative and to be honest it doesn't really bother me that much but the hubby hates hearing me vent about this type of stuff since he has heard it all before so I thought I would let it out here. Don't get me wrong I know how blessed I am to stay at home and for one of my biggest pet peeves to be annoying moms at baby meet ups and not something that is serious and an actual problem!
"MOM RIVALS"
Basically this involves moms sizing each other up, treating their child like some sort of product and comparing them to show how their skillzz are in fact the best. It goes without saying that I find it ridiculous and try not to play but I will admit it is sometimes hard not to get sucked in.
I imagine some of the moms come from corporate jobs and have a strong urge to feel like they are succeeding and doing this parenting thing "the right way", whereas others were probably incredibly obnoxious before they had children and nothing much has changed. Either way it gets so tiring constantly hearing the same crap.
Oh so how is your child sleeping? Oh really? My child is sleeping through the night. Or if your child is also sleeping through the night then their child sleeps till 9 in the morning AND takes 2 two hour naps- there is always a way to be better.
Ooh are you giving your child that? My doctor said/I heard you should actually do such and such, which is of course what we are doing.
Must be said in horrified tone- oh my gosh is it OK for your child to do that/play with something plastic/stick random crap off the floor in their mouth/insert other normal child behavior here? Hmm well we are holding off on that until XYZ because we heard that is best but that is neat that you are just putting caution to the wind and letting your child do it- insert condescending smile here-
Today one mom looked at Teddy and said, "Oh gosh what happened to you little man? Look at those bruises, did you fall down? Or how did you get hurt? That looks so painful. What happened? ... (this went on for like a minute and a half and I didn't say anything he is 9 1/2 months and can't talk if she was really wondering she could address me) All said in a fake sing song voice to him as he tried to crawl away. Now of course someone could ask what happened because they were genuinely interested (which has happened and doesn't bother me in the least) but that clearly wasn't the case today. This is what I was thinking in my head but didn't say.
First off, clearly he fell, I didn't punch him in the forehead with one finger if that is what you are implying. Second off, I can't help it that your almost one year old is a lump that just learned how to sit up, and doesn't move at all. Mine does, and since we let him explore he sometimes falls down and gets bumps but doesn't seem to be bothered in the least. This does not make me a bad mother or a good one since I cannot change the person who my son is. Speaking of which your child is cute and I would never really think they were a lump but you my friend are very annoying.
Thankfully there is normally at least one other mom who seems to be on a similar wavelength but for every 1 normal, relaxed mom I feel like there are 3 uptight, condescending, annoying ones who always show up at these things.
I know this post is sort of negative and to be honest it doesn't really bother me that much but the hubby hates hearing me vent about this type of stuff since he has heard it all before so I thought I would let it out here. Don't get me wrong I know how blessed I am to stay at home and for one of my biggest pet peeves to be annoying moms at baby meet ups and not something that is serious and an actual problem!
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
How things change.
You know when people, mainly parents, say they love newborns? How they miss that newborn stage? How they can't wait to have another and just really enjoy every moment of the first months?
That is SO NOT ME.
Honestly I thought the first few months pretty much sucked. When I look back I think of them as a sort of hazing/training period to make sure you have what it takes to enjoy the good stuff which is coming.
Don't get me wrong the feelings of love and bonding that happened in those first months were incredible. But were my days fun, often enjoyable, incredibly fulfilling? Not really.
Now on the other hand, every day literally flies by... even the hard ones. I'm constantly in awe watching Theodor interact with the world around him. He is a little scientist, intensely investigating everything around him. He is so joyous! He laughs constantly at so many things- yesterday just standing holding onto a chair with me sitting besides him was enjoyable enough for him to laugh loudly for 10 minutes.
Even the new challenges are fun in their way, or at least cute to watch if I don't think about the clean up afterward. Like his recent refusal to be spoon fed and wanting to do it himself. All I can think is that my little baby is growing up and how cool is that? He is able to show me his likes by shoving a banana in his mouth, and dislikes by for example grabbing a spoon out of my hand and flinging it on the ground.
He can play by himself and I can actually get things done around the house. He can "help" me. Which may in all actuality be creating more work but looking at his proud little face when he achieves something new or his sneaky little smiles when he does something he knows he shouldn't more then make up for a few more minutes of clean up time at the end of the day.
These are the moments which make me thrilled and excited to one day try to have another, and which make me love being able to stay at home with Theodor. This is what I was looking forward to when I was waiting for my husband to feel ready to try to have a child. These recent months are what makes it easy for me to say, I love being a mother.
That is SO NOT ME.
Honestly I thought the first few months pretty much sucked. When I look back I think of them as a sort of hazing/training period to make sure you have what it takes to enjoy the good stuff which is coming.
Don't get me wrong the feelings of love and bonding that happened in those first months were incredible. But were my days fun, often enjoyable, incredibly fulfilling? Not really.
Now on the other hand, every day literally flies by... even the hard ones. I'm constantly in awe watching Theodor interact with the world around him. He is a little scientist, intensely investigating everything around him. He is so joyous! He laughs constantly at so many things- yesterday just standing holding onto a chair with me sitting besides him was enjoyable enough for him to laugh loudly for 10 minutes.
Even the new challenges are fun in their way, or at least cute to watch if I don't think about the clean up afterward. Like his recent refusal to be spoon fed and wanting to do it himself. All I can think is that my little baby is growing up and how cool is that? He is able to show me his likes by shoving a banana in his mouth, and dislikes by for example grabbing a spoon out of my hand and flinging it on the ground.
He can play by himself and I can actually get things done around the house. He can "help" me. Which may in all actuality be creating more work but looking at his proud little face when he achieves something new or his sneaky little smiles when he does something he knows he shouldn't more then make up for a few more minutes of clean up time at the end of the day.
Teddy "helping" in the kitchen.
These are the moments which make me thrilled and excited to one day try to have another, and which make me love being able to stay at home with Theodor. This is what I was looking forward to when I was waiting for my husband to feel ready to try to have a child. These recent months are what makes it easy for me to say, I love being a mother.
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Fabulous!
Since I know everyone is dying of excitement to know how it went, I'll tell you. FABULOUS!!!
My birthday was so much fun.
Teddy went down within 30 seconds, and proceeded to sleep through until 7. Whereas I in the meantime was able to dance, drink, and enjoy myself with lots of good friends until three in the morning. Then I got to sleep in until... 9!!! am and get up feeling well rested and not a teensy bit hungover, woo hoo!
We actually could have slept in longer because Teddy also took a wonderful nap in the morning so when we went to pick him up he wasn't even awake yet.
All in all a fabulous start to my new life year!
My birthday was so much fun.
Teddy went down within 30 seconds, and proceeded to sleep through until 7. Whereas I in the meantime was able to dance, drink, and enjoy myself with lots of good friends until three in the morning. Then I got to sleep in until... 9!!! am and get up feeling well rested and not a teensy bit hungover, woo hoo!
We actually could have slept in longer because Teddy also took a wonderful nap in the morning so when we went to pick him up he wasn't even awake yet.
All in all a fabulous start to my new life year!
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Birthday!
It's my birthday on Saturday and I am super excited! Moreso then I have been in recent years past because this year we are dropping Theodor off with family for the night! A whole night and morning with absolutely no little person needing anything from me, I can't wait!!
Of course to celebrate I decided to throw a party on Friday and then head out to the party district of Hamburg and dance away the sweet hours where I could be catching up on uninterrupted sleep. But honestly Teddy sleeps so well most nights now and the hubby and I so rarely have a chance to both really party together without one person having to head home early or not imbibe so as to be on their A-game to watch our son, that I think I made the right choice. We'll see how I feel on Saturday though...I'm guessing a headache will be involved in the aftermath but it will be worth it I'm sure.
Plus there will be an adorable little boy waiting for me. Ready to put a big smile on my face and help me forget all about it:)
Of course to celebrate I decided to throw a party on Friday and then head out to the party district of Hamburg and dance away the sweet hours where I could be catching up on uninterrupted sleep. But honestly Teddy sleeps so well most nights now and the hubby and I so rarely have a chance to both really party together without one person having to head home early or not imbibe so as to be on their A-game to watch our son, that I think I made the right choice. We'll see how I feel on Saturday though...I'm guessing a headache will be involved in the aftermath but it will be worth it I'm sure.
Plus there will be an adorable little boy waiting for me. Ready to put a big smile on my face and help me forget all about it:)
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Christmas Jams
I mentioned a few weeks ago that I was attempting homemade Christmas presents this year. More specifically homemade jams and marmelades and macaroons.
Now according to Wiki: A macaroon (/mɑːˈkæ rʊŋ/ mah-kæ-rʊŋ ) is a type of light, baked confections, described as either small cakes or meringue-like cookies depending on their consistency. The original macaroon was a "small sweet cake consisting largely of ground almonds"[1] similar to Italian or Moroccan amaretti.
My first macaroons were awful, they consisted almost solely of almonds and sunk into themselves if you touched them. My second go at them was a big improvement. I made them lemon and they really tasted like what I imagine lemon clouds would taste like- sugary lemon fluff, in case you are wondering.
The jams were also hit or miss. My first jam: Grapefruit Sesame was a breeze, my second: Fig berry a complete and utter failure, my third: Carrot Spice cake was quite good, and my fourth: Ashley's winter mix was something that I created myself and ended up being one of my favorites. It was mainly blackberry, red currants, a bit of apple, and gingerbread spice.
Here is a picture of the finished product. I was really pleased, and the hubby already finished a jar of each off so I know they did in fact taste good. I think I will do something similar next year and hopefully will have a bit more time to do the labels and packaging, as I feel like I could have done something much nicer- but I only had so much I could get done during nap times before Christmas!
Now according to Wiki: A macaroon (/mɑːˈkæ rʊŋ/ mah-kæ-rʊŋ ) is a type of light, baked confections, described as either small cakes or meringue-like cookies depending on their consistency. The original macaroon was a "small sweet cake consisting largely of ground almonds"[1] similar to Italian or Moroccan amaretti.
My first macaroons were awful, they consisted almost solely of almonds and sunk into themselves if you touched them. My second go at them was a big improvement. I made them lemon and they really tasted like what I imagine lemon clouds would taste like- sugary lemon fluff, in case you are wondering.
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| The 2nd go at macaroons |
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| My winter jelly tasted the most "Christmasy" to me. |
Here is a picture of the finished product. I was really pleased, and the hubby already finished a jar of each off so I know they did in fact taste good. I think I will do something similar next year and hopefully will have a bit more time to do the labels and packaging, as I feel like I could have done something much nicer- but I only had so much I could get done during nap times before Christmas!
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| Everyone got 3 jars of jam and 2 macaroons. They were supposed to get more of the cookies but after messing up once I didn't enough time to do more then one batch. |
Monday, January 3, 2011
9 months!
Theodor has now been gracing our fair earth with his presence for a longer period of time then he was inside of me, growing and stretching out my once fab stomach.He has completely enmeshed himself in our lives and we are all happier for it.
So much is happening now and at a whirlwind pace. He pulls himself up on EVERYTHING. The first week of this new skill he was unsteady, fell often, and seemed to need everything just so to make it up on his feet. Now a good week later he is pulling himself up on anything, even if it is moving, and although he still falls he rolls right out of it and keeps on going. He now "cruises" (I didn't come up with this term- it just means walking with the aid of your hands being supported by objects in a room like a chair or table) from table to sofa to dishwasher and back again with a huge grin on his face.
When I see how much he has accomplished in a week I can't imagine what I will be writing about at the end of this month.
We all had a great Christmas and New Year and I am looking forward to all the wonderful things this year will bring us.
So much is happening now and at a whirlwind pace. He pulls himself up on EVERYTHING. The first week of this new skill he was unsteady, fell often, and seemed to need everything just so to make it up on his feet. Now a good week later he is pulling himself up on anything, even if it is moving, and although he still falls he rolls right out of it and keeps on going. He now "cruises" (I didn't come up with this term- it just means walking with the aid of your hands being supported by objects in a room like a chair or table) from table to sofa to dishwasher and back again with a huge grin on his face.
When I see how much he has accomplished in a week I can't imagine what I will be writing about at the end of this month.
We all had a great Christmas and New Year and I am looking forward to all the wonderful things this year will bring us.
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| We got Theodor one Christmas present, A Duplo Lego set. He likes it! Right now he mainly likes banging the blocks and putting things in and out of the container which is so cute to watch. You can also see where our couch table normally is in this picture.... |
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| And where he recently pushed it to! He pushed it all the way to our TV and then walked it back:D |
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| This metal storage locker from Ikea is one of his favorite things to "play" with. There are 2 keys in keyholes which he is constantly taking out so that he can then slam the doors open and close. |
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| Trying to climb up on to his walker, surprisingly he didn't fall. |
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| Deciding that perhaps walking around the walker makes more sense. |
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