My poor mother

I was skyping with my mother recently and she mentioned how disappointed she was that I wasn't updating this blog more regularly as during the last pregnancy she had really felt like she was a part of things, mainly due to my blogging.

While I completely understand where she is coming from, this pregnancy emotionally is just so different then the last that I don't think I will ever be able to muster up the effort to blog about it regularly. I mean so far during this pregnancy I have taken one pregnancy belly picture, about 10 weeks ago I believe- although speaking of weeks I can almost never tell you what week I am at, unless I just had a doctor's appointment, so you can see the fun belly progression of 14 weeks to..... hopefully I will manage to take one this week.
During this pregnancy I have also read exactly 0 books to get me prepared for the birth and baby, during the previous pregnancy I was probably at 30 by now. I haven't joined any special birth month pregnancy groups online, and am not really interested in doing so. I am planning on doing hypnobabies again but I don't need to start the 5 week self-study course until July and this time there is no way I would even consider starting it at week 25 like last time.

Honestly this reads as though I am not excited but I am, I am so thrilled that there is going to be another awesome little boy lighting up our lives. But this time I get to be excited about the realities which I know are coming, and I don't need to focus so much on all the possibilities. I know that I am going to have an insanely large stomach in just a few weeks so right now I love the fact that I still barely notice it now. I know that the first months will be a big adjustment so I am enjoying how easy our routine is and how much free time we both have for friends and hobbies living with our two year old right now. I know that the birth is something awesome and special but also difficult and maybe not something I want to spend months and months thinking about so I'm not.

I'm excited to have two little boys running around the house but I know that is still a ways off so I am focusing on the here and now and how enjoyable it is. I also really, really, really, REALLY love this age. 2 is awesome. Is he testing us? Sure. But is he also becoming more creative, more talkative, and overall just more of a person? Most definitely and it is so fun to watch and be a part of.

My pregnancies so far have both been easy and pretty much stress free. No diabetes, high blood pressure, trouble with position, etc. so I am really able to just sort of go on with my life as though I'm not even pregnant.... although I won't lie I miss drinking so much more than last time. I think because my nights out with the girls and with my husband and friends took on even more importance once Teddy entered our lives and going out every weekend was often unrealistic. Not that I am not still going out with friends and having fun but I definitely am looking forward to my first night out once the baby comes and I can really let loose. I also am surprised by how much I want to try for a third. We've both decided to just wait and see how it goes with two but a strong part of me really wants to go for 3, and space the last two perhaps even a bit closer together (but not closer than 2 years) so as to get the baby stage done with. Part of this does have to do with really wanting to have a daughter but at the same time even if baby number 2 had been a girl I feel pretty confident that I still would have wanted to have a third just as much, and of course I am prepared that I could have a third boy which is more than alright with me. But we'll see how I feel once the second actually arrives though!

So I'm just about 24 weeks and will try to update again before the baby comes. I won't promise more because I am guessing it isn't going to happen, but you never know.

40 Weeks

I got a pregnancy massage yesterday and it helped so much with the pain and discomfort I am feeling! I have a lot of back pain which is partially due to carrying almost all of the 40 pounds I have gained right in my stomach. The massage really made me feel human again and it was great. I am still uncomfortable but I have another one booked for next Wednesday as it is so worth the money.

I feel completely at peace with hitting 40 weeks. Now that Teddy can't come early there isn't really anything for me to hope for LOL. So I am just going to enjoy these next few days or weeks until he comes. I am allowed to deliver at the birth center until 42 weeks= April 1st and I am sure he will play along and come before then so now it is just a trying to stay as comfortable as possible until the time comes game :D

Stretch Marks

As you all know this is my first pregnancy. I have always been prepared to get stretch marks since my mom has them and they are hereditary, but I have to say that I totally wasn't ready to get some so early.

I have them ALL OVER. ALREADY. AT 27 STUPID WEEKS. The ones below my belly button are at least clearish but the ones above are dark red and look like bruises.

Honestly this is hard for me to deal with. Weight gain,pimples, etc are all no problem as I know they will go away with time but these are with me for life. I was hoping to just have them pop up in the last week or two so that I was quickly so engrossed with baby Theodor to care. But clearly nature had other plans.

Now I get to spend the next three months watching my stomach go from smooth and pretty to covered with scars. Yay!

I am guessing that after a few days I will be OK with how my stomach looks now and will have moved on but noticing them in the mirror today really hurt.

Thankfully I still feel pretty when my belly is covered- here is a picture for 27 weeks.The flash made my bra visible- but it wasn't in person:D

Vacation

We went away for a week and it was amazing. I know some women get nervous about flying or traveling long distances during pregnancy but if you have the possibility to get away and you are having a healthy pregnancy, I HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend it. I felt so good! Relaxed and happy and pretty:) If we could go away every month up until the birth I totally would LOL. Here is a pic of me from the trip.

We have renovations going on in January and then I can finally start on the nursery. I am slowly amassing all the things I need, and am happy to say that I am almost done purchasing all the cloth diapers we will need for the first few months. I'm hoping to have everything purchased and ready by the second week of February. We'll see!

24 weeks

Hmmm, can't really hide the belly anymore :D

Looking Back

I'm at 23 weeks in my pregnancy and I am feeling wonderful. So wonderful in fact that I have started to enjoy looking back. I have gone over the posts I made while waiting to try and have looked at my chart from the cycle that led to little Theodor. I have looked back at the first pregnancy test pictures, and the ultrasounds, and the (lets be honest non-existent belly) belly shots, and it is still a bit unbelievable for me.

I mean I feel Theodor kicking away constantly and my stomach definitely looks pregnant now but I still sometimes have trouble believing that in a few months my husband and I will really be a family of three.

It has been a lot of fun to remember the feelings of excitement when I got my first positive test and to reminisce on the weeks which have gone by. The morning sickness is now a vague memory for me which I of course didn't think would be possible, and I am really starting to realize that there isn't all that much time left before we meet our son.

Wow. Our son. I don't think I could say that aloud yet. We'll see how I feel in a few months.

So much love

I grew up with a mom who always, always told me she loved me. So it is still normal for me to say I love you all the time to the people whom I love- mainly my husband and my mom, and most recently Theodor.

It is crazy how much I already love him. It is almost as if I can feel my heart expanding just for him. He already means so much to me and makes me happy just by squirming around and sleeping. To feel such strong emotions towards someone who I have never met and really know nothing about was a bit of a surprise. But really there is absolutely no way that he could not exceed all of my expectations and hopes, as he already is absolutely perfect.

This is turning out to be such a wonderful journey filled with so many great emotions. I can't imagine how it will be when he actually arrives and becomes a more active member of our family.
I can't wait.

20 weeks!

Wow! We are halfway there. I think both my husband and I are still in awe and shock when it comes down to it.I mean in just a few months we are going to have a baby boy with us. It is so incredible and exciting and I am so so thankful that so far this has been such a pleasant ride for us. See how easy it is to forget terrible morning sickness? Mother nature is a very strong thing indeed. Here are some pics of me at the halfway mark.

Theodore

So I think that finding out the sex and seeing our healthy baby really helped make Theodore even more "real" for us.

We purchased our first outfit specially for -him-. It is incredible to think that our little baby boy will actually be wearing it in the near future.

It is also wonderful to watch my husband get excited for the child who will be entering our lives. He asked yesterday if the baby could sleep with us. Not all the time but for naps and on the weekend as he thought it would be pretty awesome. Of course I said yes. I have trouble sleeping when people are touching me though so I think we will probably end up getting one of those bassinets that goes next to the side of the bed and is like a half circle. They normally have railing on one side and since the baby still has it's own space I think I would feel better about it, and hopefully still be able to sleep.

Although who are we kidding I am sure hours of my life will be taken up with just staring at Theodore while he is sleeping. I can't wait.

The "Big" one

So we had the "big" appointment today and it went great.

First the doctor showed us the heart and said it looked perfect just as it should, then we saw the ribs and spine- it is crazy how much you can see and how "human" it looks now. She also showed us that it had a full bladder and open mouth which shows that the digestion process is working correctly-but I am sure you all don't care about that LOL.

She asked if we wanted to know the sex and we said yes- she said at this point girl's vaginal lips are pronounced so it can look like testicles but it looks like you are having a girl, although I am not sure yet - and she kept looking for a better angle. I was thrilled!

Then DH said but what is that? and she laughed and said the umbilical cord:D

But then about 3 seconds later she said- oh no that is most definitely a boy :D And little Theodore showed us his package a few times after that and she was even able to get a picture so we are most definitely having a boy LOL. The doctor thought it was so cute that I was so excited when I thought it was a girl and a boy- but how could I not be when it is our first?!

We are both thrilled. I thought that it was what we were having but then I thought that I would have to be wrong so probably girl:D We will also be going to a 3/D U/S place in the next few weeks just to check for a cleft since my doctor can't tell about that but as of now everything looks great and we are having a healthy boy:D

Nervous

So the big u/s is officially a week away and I am scared. We have names picked out for both sexes and I will be thrilled if it is a boy or a girl, so that is not what I am nervous about. I am nervous about being one of the one in a thousand or ten thousand or twenty thousand who gets the news that something does not look right.

I know the chances are slim but that doesn't keep me from having a general feeling of dread about the day. I am trying really hard to focus on the positive- like the fact that I am feeling the baby all the time now. Which is absolutely wonderful and I am sure it is baby's way of telling me that they are doing just fine but unfortunately my brain won't shut off. I've read the statistics and stories and know what is possible and will probably not be able to calm down until the ultrasound is over next Wednesday.

Any positive thoughts you all can share are appreciated.

13 Weeks

2nd Trimester! Woo hoo! To celebrate we went out to lunch, and saw Final Destination 4- it was great:D

On cloud 9

I love Emmaljunga strollers. I have been lusting after the Emmaljunga Edge Duo Combi for months. I knew well before we even got pregnant that I had to have one. I didn't care that they costed 900 euros I just had to have it.

Thankfully a certain site called E.bay exists so I was able to find the pram I wanted for about half the going retail price. I have been watching auctions for months now, often not bidding because the pram was too old, not the right color scheme, etc or bidding and losing, but yesterday the miracle of all miracles happened... I got my dream pram!

It is a year and a half old looks new and the exact color scheme I wanted. It features SO much it is ridiculous, however if you really want ridiculous you should check out the opening videos on the Emmal website. Definitely good for some laughs! If you then click UK and English you can find my stroller on the bottom right hand corner.





We are picking it up in two weeks and I can't wait. I am already in love:)

12 Weeks

Baby needs just enough room to make mommy look chubby around the tummy area... mommy hopes baby grows just a bit more so that other people know she is pregnant at the fitness club.
Mommy admits that she is vain and shallow and that she would never consider someone else chubby who only had a bit of a healthy normal stomach. Mommy holds herself to other standards however- crazy, pregnancy stomach standards LOL.

Coke, Coffee, Subway, and Hot Dogs

These are all things I have consumed in the past week. Clearly I am not to strict when it comes to food rules- although to be honest I have strong doubts when it comes to some of the things doctors suggest in the States. I feel like they think pregnant women are to stupid to do anything in moderation so they just forbid it to make things easier for themselves.

Case in point- caffeine: All studies have only shown a risk if you consume medium to high amounts of caffeine- there is absolutely no affect on the baby if you consume small amounts. So one cup of coffee a day is just fine, a coke is also OK but there is a ton of sugar in them which is of course just plain unhealthy. Doctors here say caffeine is fine in small amounts and I am glad that I can still enjoy the occasional cappuccino.

The lunchmeat thing- Now the big danger here is listeriosis which is incredibly dangerous to a pregnant woman. At the same time the current amount of cases in Germany per year are incredibly low- about 200. I guess I would never start eating lunch meat every day just to see what my chances are but I also won't feel bad about eating Subway once a month. I also read that salami and salted meats are a bit safer, which works in my favor since they are personal favorites of mine.

I don't like cold hot dogs or "bratwurst" so I am always heating them up anyway thus negating the terrible, terrible danger lurking behind the colorful packaging of wieners and franks.

Sushi and fish- Do Japanese pregnant women stop eating sushi and fish? I would really like to know because I think cutting down on fish and tuna sucks. I normally only eat sushi about once or twice a year so I will probably keep up with that crazy high number even during pregnancy but I have to admit that I have been avoiding fish and I am not sure why. Can someone tell me why fish should only be consumed seldomly? As of right now I am eating salmon or tuna about once every 2 weeks but I would love to start eating it every week again...

Sometimes I think I am an awful pregnant woman especially when my most recent meal is doritos but then I remember the chicken pesto with a homemade tomato sauce and linguine that I made for lunch and the fact that I am walking or working out almost every day,and think, "hey- maybe I am just a normal pregnant woman who likes tasty food":D

U/S appt

Today was big appointment for me. There are three big U/S check-ups during the pregnancy here in Germany and today at 10 weeks 1 day (or so I thought;) was one of them.

It was AMAZING. I wish I had thought to make a video with my cell phone because it was just so cool to see our little baby moving all around, waving, kicking its cute little feet,and you know- not looking like a blob:D

Baby is doing great and I got good news- I'm actually farther along then I thought. My new due date is March 18th! That means I hit 11 weeks tomorrow. Woo hoo!

Here are the two pics she printed out for us-sorry that they aren't the best ones. Just imagine the cutest little baby ever and that is what the U/S looked like in person:D :D




I also got medication for my acid/indigestion problem, and iron pills since I am low on iron. Hopefully these will help with my energy as well!

10 weeks

Ultrasound pic to hopefully follow after appt tomorrow.

I feel sick most of the time but feel like it is easing up. I throw up every few days, sometimes it is awful throwing up everything in my stomach and sometimes it is over quickly and not that bad.

I do have a stomach though which is a bit fun for me. With most of my clothes you would never notice but I feel it when I wear jeans- am using the rubber band trick, and the lovely husband noticed right away:D

Belly Pics

So I am officially 8 weeks today. Woo hoo!

I though that I could post some belly pics to show how much I have grown- basically not at all . Tee hee.

The hubby has noticed some changes but really if I have gained it hasn't been more then a pound due to the morning sickness, plus I think the week 4 and week 8 picture are pretty much identical but you can tell me if you disagree.

The chest has gotten a bit bigger but not so much that I need a new bra or anything like that. I'm not disappointed that my stomach has not really gotten bigger yet. I just hope that there is enough room for the baby- yes I realize it is the size of a raspberry right now- I mean for later :D

Names

You're pregnant? Wow. Congrats.

DO YOU HAVE A NAME PICKED OUT ALREADY??!!!

DUN DUN DUN.

I love planning so of course even before we were TTC I had a spreadsheet with names I liked. I even went through a baby book with 40,000 names and highlighted all the ones I thought were nice or interesting and then added them to my spreadsheet. (Not in one day of course).

But I don't get to pick the name---- "we" get to pick the name. We are both strong willed and have very clear ideas when it comes to what we like in names. Thankfully we both tend to like some things; unique, not popular, but not made up by us, etc. and we have agreed on the right to veto. If the other person doesn't like a name -for whatever reason- then it can't be used. It's as simple as that.

However this still leads to long conversations where a list containing over 50 names will be shot down.

We are planning on just waiting until we find out the sex before discussing it further but I have to admit that even though I know it will be hard, I am really looking forward to picking out a name.Plus it is probably good that I have the hubby around to keep me from going a bit too gung ho and naming the child something like Atlas- yep I actually considered the name of the Greek god who carried the earth on his shoulders :D

I highly recommend this site, http://www.nymbler.com/ for anyone searching for names. It takes into account names that you like and suggests other names which you might like. Her other site, baby name wizard is also good for looking up the stats on a name.

7 weeks 1 day

and this is all I have to show for it :D :D



There was a nice strong heartbeat, and baby is measuring in at 1.1 cm,my new due date is March 23rd. The doctor said everything looks great and that I have nothing to worry about. Thanks for all the positive thoughts everyone I really appreciate it!